First off I want to take a moment and thank you all for your comments on my last post. I am flattered, I really really am!! There was a day when a bikini photo wouldn't have been taken let alone posted to the Internet for anyone to see. I am glad I have gotten to this point. Jena said it best: It's empowering.
Seeing all of your comments coming in really got me thinking about self confidence (mine and others) and where it comes from. In the past, my own confidence came from (near) perfection. If I got an A+ on a paper I felt great. If I won a public speaking competition or was top of my class I felt proud and held my head high. If in someone else's estimation I was the funniest/smartest/prettiest girl I would smile ear to ear. On those days I was confident.
On the days when I wasn't the funniest, didn't get the best grade or found out I'd gotten a few questions wrong on an exam my confidence took a nose dive. But why? Only days earlier I was on top of the world. How could a 90% test score or someone else being called the most attractive girl in school change all that?
You see it was never about what it meant to be the best so much as how I viewed not being the best. The errors, the room for improvement, the good but not good enough. Even when I did well I would dwell on how I could have done better. And it has literally robbed me of so much pride and joy that I should have taken in the accomplishments that I have made.
Now is my chance to change all that. As I said yesterday I am not at my ideal weight but that doesn't mean that I can't be happy with the way I look or feel. If I focus on the positives (I love my curves in a sassy dress) instead of the negatives (I wish I had slimmer thighs) I am a happier girl without losing a single pound!
Similarly I can choose to look at what I am doing to get ready for my upcoming 1/2 marathon (super hydrating. eating a variety of wholesome food, cross training) instead of obsessing about all the miles I didn't run or hills I didn't train on. Race day will come either way so its up to me to decide how I want to feel about it when it gets here.
Realistically my life was never and will never be perfect. There will be bumps in the road, I will fall down and get back up, I will make mistakes, come in 2nd (or 302nd) and fly under the radar. Slowly but surely I am learning that its more than fine to be a work in progress. I'm perfectly imperfect and and that's is fine by me.
And if all else fails, I get an A+ in sass. Heck, I've got some to share if you're interested!!
So tell me, what makes you feel confident? Go ahead and brag!